


Bedtime Reading

by AlterImpulse (orphan_account)



Category: Xenogears
Genre: Age Difference, Anal Fingering, Anal Fisting, Anal Sex, Caught, Characters Reading Bad Fanfiction, Energy Field Sexual Interfacing, Established Relationship, Explicit Consent, Explicit Sexual Content, Implied future threesome, Long Live Feedback Comment Project, M/M, Masturbation Interruptus, Misuse of the Force, Oedipal Issues, PWP, Post-Canon, Reading Aloud, Supernatural Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-14
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-06-10 03:00:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15282120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/AlterImpulse
Summary: Solaris had the worst gay romances ever, but one gives Citan and Fei an idea, when Fei needs more inside him.Written for Of Men And Machines 2018 - Xenogears M/M Slash Challenge for prompt 26: Guilty Pleasures.Post-canon setting, vaguely. I’m not going into the details of the canon end here so just…assume somehow they aren’t with Elly and Yui here? Or they are but Elly and Yui are okay with them doing it with each other. Whatever.TW/CW: The paragraphs where Fei is reading the Solarian romance novel contains violence, dubious consent, and is intended to be fucked up because it is a bad romance fic from a society of Space Nazis. I chose not to use the tags for those two paragraphs as general fic tags because in the main story there's consent, etc.





	Bedtime Reading

**Author's Note:**

> CN: This story is not a guide to safe or responsible sex practices. Always use condoms when having sex in our reality, and if for some reason you want to explore fisting or other extreme anal insertions there are actual classes and valid sources of information - which, if you choose to do so, are necessary because you aren't a doctor with knowledge of the anatomy involved.

Fei opened the door to their room, and his eyes landed on Citan as he sat in the room in the fusion of ship and city wreckage that made up a living space. The limited lighting seemed to highlight his form in a way - they needed to install more, and he knew they did. Yet the soft lighting appealed to him in its own way, the way it lit the room with such a perfect glow. The other man’s glasses seemed to glow, lit in their own soft white way that Fei knew by this point meant that he had them on their darkness/reading setting, with additional lighting and set to allow him to not have to hold the book too close to his face.

 _He doesn’t even know I’m here,_ Fei thought, as he quietly closed the door behind himself. The hour was late already, and he had been out on a long day of building. If this settlement where they currently were living were to have any hope of sustaining life through the coming winter, it would need the hydroponic greenhouses ready to go within four weeks. Fei’s project involved both building and attempting to recall knowledge from his Kim incarnation, then attempting to power the batteries by whatever means he could, though he preferred when they stored from the sun - trying to contact exhausted him, even if a battery with even the slightest atom of the Wave Existence could outperform any other.

That meant Citan’s workday often was far less than his own, something he slightly envied him over - that his work consisted of five hours of working on anything related to the machines and then to being on call as one of the two doctors in the settlement. _At least he has time to read. But… then I don’t mind too much. A little bedtime reading. I wonder what it is. Probably his usual boring stuff. I remember when he tried to get me to read Don Quixote and I fell asleep. Then he told me at least he’d cured my insomnia. Whoever in Solaris gave him his license…_

Fei saw that he was in his sleeping robes, the soft light green silk summer kimono that he could wear for the next three months before autumn came and made it too cold, and required he switch to the one with thicker layers of fabric, with the delicate gold thread embroidery that suggested it had been made in either Nisan or Solaris before the fall, and the long, gray-black hair fell down around his face. Then Fei noticed the sleeping robe was open, and chuckled to himself, as he saw Citan’s hand move beneath it and heard a soft moan.

“So, you finally found something more exciting to read, did you?” He ducked out of the way to avoid the instinctive move of a former Solarian spy being caught by surprise, so Citan would not hurt him by accident with the backward whirl and kick before he even knew who was there.

“I did not know you would have returned so early!” At this point, he had grabbed for his glasses, and regained his composure, as he put them on, with a change to their normal mode. “Ahem. I found this very interesting book in the storage along with this kimono. While it may not be to your taste because of where it was set, it is one of my favorites.”

“Obviously,” Fei said. “And without me? You couldn’t wait for me to get here? You know how worked up it gets me when I have to touch one of those to the Animus Relic at the base of my spine and I can feel the vibrations from it having power run through it and it’s like I can’t do anything about it out there and-”

“I know it very well, as this is nothing new for you. How many were you doing today, anyway?”

“The entire second array. I’ve had the energy flowing through that relic all day, and it feels so exhausting and yet like it makes me all tense inside and-” Fei picked up the book, and he could not hold back his laughter in that moment.

“The Petals and the Servant,” Fei read, and stared for a moment at the cover, of a First Class Solarian Element who looked vaguely like Sigurd. He held a whip and dripping candle over an androgynous Third Class worker in chains, a set of sheep horns, and nothing else. “‘Inspired by classic early Anthropocene scribblings such as Fifty Shades of O De Sade, this story follows a pathetic Lamb as he earns the love of his superior Master.’ Citan, _really_?”

“One cannot choose what one finds arousing. I particularly enjoy the scene where Shiloh begs Sig-ah! Ahem, Adelger to purge him but allow him to live and he is squirming in such pleasure as they have found a way to do that, and he is screaming begging to be purged and made a pure Solarian harder-”

“I don’t think I need to hear much more,” Fei said, as he stifled a snort. “Aside from leaving me with serious concerns about your having truly left your past and the stuff that’s kinda, you know, _racist_....”

“Oh, so that passage is not to your taste? I am sorry, sometimes I do forget myself, and how we were, and how casual we were about it. There is another one where Shiloh is finally a kept pet of Adelger…” He held out the book. “Read it for me?”

Fei blinked, nonetheless picking up the book and beginning to read. “Pathetic Shiloh walked over to the sky-blue window and reflected on his painful surroundings. He had always hated horrifying, ultralescent Solaris Purging Hall with its aura of purgatory. Then an admirable figure of Adelger, in leathery leather with his snow white hair and amber skin. The sun shone like quietly skipping horses, making Shiloh calm and at peace to await his punishment. Adelger grabbed a big, long, hard whip that had been strewn nearby; he massaged it with his fingers. As poor, sobbing Shiloh stepped inside and big, tall, strong Adelger came closer, he could see the bright glint in his deep blue topaz eye. ‘I am here because I want to bury my fist in my tiny pet Lamb's arsehole,’ Adelger bellowed, in a sinister tone. He slammed his whip against Shiloh's chest, with the force of an entire battalion. ‘I frigging hate you, Shiloh.’ Shiloh looked back, calmed by the display from his shaking sobs, and still fingering the big, long, hard whip between its painfulyry lashes. ‘Adelger, master, please more,’ he replied.”

Fei put the book down, and tried to resist the urge to throw it across the room. “Again, Citan, the hell? _This_ gets you-”

“The craving of what is now for me a taboo, and what was once my life.” He leaned in for a kiss. “I need you so much now, I know I haven’t been much for my usual way of working up to it, and if it would trouble you-”

“It would trouble me if you didn’t!” Fei threw his arms around him, and pulled him down to their bed. “Every time I draw into the relic at the base of my back, it makes me feel so good inside to channel the power through it, but I’m all tight inside and everything feels like I’m buzzing from my legs to my butt to-”

“You are definitely in need,” Citan replied, as he shrugged off his sleeping robe the rest of the way. “I may be slightly fast tonight, when you surprised me I had almost gotten myself to the point of release-”

"I could tell,” Fei said with a small laugh. “You try to be quiet, but once you moaned like that I knew.” He threw his legs up onto his shoulders in a well-practiced move. “You were ready for me, though, and you already have lube on you and…”

“So eager, Fei. You truly cannot wait any more than I.”

Fei almost shivered at those words and at the sight before him. The glasses were no longer lit with their backlighting, so he no longer looked into two circles of light but into his eyes, and saw what he craved, the desire Citan had for his body, the look of adoration and awe. _He may be on top, but he knows he’s not the boss. When I see that look, I know he’d do anything for me._ _I’ll play with him a bit for his even reading that._ “Hold there like that,” he whispered. “Absolutely still.” Fei slowly, deliberately slid himself down onto him instead of his usual way to lie still.

With how good it already felt, it was so tempting for him to end the teasing and just take him in completely. Yet to feel Citan half inside him, and to look up and see him biting his lip and looking for everything as if he was right at the edge already - it was the perfect sight, and Fei had to admit he enjoyed every moment of the teasing, despite their both craving fast, rough sex.

“Please,” and Fei finally took him in fully at that word, in an almost desperate whimper against his lips.

The feeling, everything Fei had craved since that morning. The embedded relic in his back pulsed, an almost vibrating rhythm of its own against that spot within him, and each bump and push into it brought more intense feelings, especially as Citan lost the last vestige of composure he had over his own need.

Fei cried out as his own body seemed to move of that same need, and he felt a deep sensation of arousal, of pleasure from the relic and from that spot within him, as if he were in full contact with both his lover and the power his body held. He groaned again as Citan’s and his bodies pressed together in a passionate embrace, and he felt a warmth within as Citan lay on him, entirely spent in that moment.

Yet Fei craved more, needed more - he was so hard. The relic still pulsed against his swollen prostate and his sacral nerve with the remainder of energy it contained, combining the sensations into a blur of pleasure and the most intense desire to release. “I’m, I need to, please,” he choked out, shocked at how desperate that sounded.

“The usual for when I come first, then?”

“Yes!” Fei groaned as Citan slid two fingers into his ass. The pressure was almost teasing, tantalizing, but it wasn’t enough, this time, as he rode them, pushed around them - he craved something bigger, something more to fully stretch himself in and the scene he read popped into his mind. “Citan… your hand...like in that book, can that work and-“

“Mmm. I do think you would enjoy that at this point.” Citan moved to grab a glove from his medical kit, and slid it over one hand.

Fei moaned in anticipation as he watched Citan coat his now gloved hand and wrist with lube. “‘You’re gonna put all that in me…”

“As much as you need, as much as you can take. Now, Fei, I want you to push as strongly as you can…”

He did, and let out a deep grunt of satisfaction as Citan’s fist easily slid into him. Such intense pressure and fullness, and he loved it, needed it, begging as he greedily rode it, no longer the Contact or any of his personas or incarnations, just a man enjoying what, to him, felt so absolutely satisfying, so perfect.

Or at least he had thought so, until he felt the heel of Citan’s other hand press into the curve of his back, at that juncture of implanted relic and spine. He screamed, a scream of “yes, _fuck_ yes, harder!”

“With that, you could wake the dead,” Citan teased, as he kissed what he could reach in that position, Fei’s neck. “I can make you come if I do that at the same time. Would you enjoy that?”

Fei nodded a quick yes, beyond words at that point, his breath coming fast between groans as he strained and pushed, though it felt so good each time, as Citan slid deeper into him then back almost out again.

“Now, Fei, look, please.”

Fei looked back to see Citan’s arm sunk into his body for the full length of the glove, to the elbow, and in that moment he felt something so overwhelming, so intense, so powerful the word “come” almost seemed too little to describe it, that no words did or could except for the half groan, half scream of his lover’s name as his untouched cock jerked hard.

“It seems you need another time to actually release it all, you are so close.” And with those words, the same feeling, except instead of building it released into absolute bliss. Fei tried to lose himself in the moment to stay there forever, as he panted for breath. He suddenly felt empty as Citan slid his arm out of him, that little “pop” of his stretched body returning to normal that always made him feel a bit strange to adjust to not having something inside him.

“That was amazing,” he said, and felt stupid for what a weak description it was, but he was tired and the ache, the driving need was gone, replaced by another need - one to be held, shown love, touched. 

Citan threw the glove into the wastebasket, wiped his glasses on the bedsheets, then laid next to him. That was the most important part for Fei, something both of them instinctively knew.

“I love you,” Fei whispered, as he rolled over onto him to rest his head on his chest. “Not Solaris’ guardian angel. Mine.”

“And I, you.” Citan kissed him, and played with a strand of his hair as they lay there together. “You should wear this down all the time.”

“Then you’d never be able to keep your hands off me. You and your thing for that long hair.” Fei laughed. “That guy on the cover…”

“He had his secrets, Fei. But we are no longer-“

“That’s a shame.” Fei said, with a small smile. “Because I’d like to see what ‘Adelger’ can do.”

“Maybe we shall meet up with Sigurd again soon.” Citan said, and held onto Fei in a close embrace. “Would you not like to have both of us?”

“I’m certain I would. But… I don’t like to be hurt. Not like that guy in the book…”

“Understood, and you are one who works through your pain with being taken care of, not through more pain.” A kiss. “I am happy that I travel by your side again. You saved me, as much as I you.”

Fei kissed him back, a slow, passionate kiss. “I want another round.”

“It will be different without the, ahem, urgency provided by the leftover energy from contacting-“

“I know,” Fei whispered. “And I want it that way. I have my times when I just need something to physically release… and now that I’ve done that…”

“Now you want to cuddle but with-“

“With a little more fun,” Fei said, as he rubbed Citan’s nipple slightly. “Can I suck on it? Elly always got upset when I’d ask…”

“Why not?”

Fei fell asleep a few minutes later, holding onto him still, but their plans for more forgotten for the time being as they settled into sleep together.

**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:
> 
>   * Short comments 
>   * Long comments
>   * Questions
>   * Constructive criticism unless it is about the couple/ship itself - I know what is and is not canon, or about the sex itself, as I know it is unrealistic. 
>   * “<3” as extra kudos
>   * Reader-reader interaction
> 

> 
> [LLF Comment Builder](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/post/170952243543/now-presenting-the-llf-comment-builder-beta)
> 
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